Classic Monopoly game is about to get a 'woke' upgrade: Community Chest cards to be updated with 'feel-good moments'

For nearly 100 years, American children and adults have enjoyed the classic Monopoly board game. One of the features of the game is the Community Chest, where players draw a card that results in financial rewards or penalties, sends a player to jail, or gets a jailbird out of the clink.

Now, in today's "woke" society, Hasbro has decided that the cards no longer match what they perceive as their customers' cultural priorities.

The company launched a new website to allow people to vote on how best to "update the Community Chest cards to include feel-good moments that reflect the best things about being part of a community."

In a post on the Hasbro site Thursday, the company declared, "Goodbye Second Place in A Beauty Contest, Hello Shopping Local! Monopoly Is (Finally) Updating the Community Chest Cards – and You Get to Decide How."

"The world has changed a lot since Monopoly became a household name more than 85 years ago, and clearly today community is more important than ever," Eric Nyman, Hasbro's chief consumer officer, said in a news release. "We felt like 2021 was the perfect time to give fans the opportunity to show the world what community means to them through voting on new Community Chest Cards. We're really excited to see what new cards get voted in!"

What do the proposed new cards say?

No longer will the 16 cards focus on the "school tax" or "bank errors" or "beauty contests." Just simply going to "directly to jail" is out. And you can apparently forget about that whole advance-to-GO-just-for-the-heck-of-it thing.

The new cards are all about sending a message about the importance of being a "woke" member of your community.

These cards will lecture you on the importance of volunteering, community involvement, not upsetting your neighbors, giving blood, rescuing puppies, shopping local, recycling — and even naming bugs.

Visitors to MonopolyCommunityChest.com can cast 16 votes, picking their favorite cards as pairs of potential woke messages vie for the honor of replacing the traditional stack of Monopoly moves.

Below are the 32 voting options available on the Hasbro site. (Editor's note: The game no longer uses dollar signs but instead uses Monopoly's own money symbol. For the sake of simplicity, we're using the "$" here.)

"You volunteer your art skills and point a mural at the local school! COLLECT $50"
vs.
"You organize a group to clean up your town's walking path. COLLECT $50

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You organize a bake sale for your local school. COLLECT $25"
vs.
"You weed the community garden and discover a new bug! Name it something fun! THEN COLLECT $25"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"Blasting music late at night? Your neighbors do not approve. GO TO JAIL. GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL. DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200"
vs.
You find a wallet on the sidewalk and decide not to return it! GO TO JAIL. GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL. DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You volunteer to run the social media accounts for a non-profit art center, and you meet some pretty talented people! COLLECT $100"
vs.
"You set aside time every week to hang out with your elderly neighbor — you've heard some amazing stories! COLLECT $100"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You volunteer as a homework helper, and you learn some stuff, too! COLLECT $100"
vs.
"You spend the day playing games with kids at a local children's hospital. COLLECT $100"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You donate your birthday money to a community center. Keep a little for yourself. COLLECT $10"
vs.
"You donate blood. There were free cookies! COLLECT $10"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"Your friends video chat you after a tough day. GET OUT OF JAIL FREE."
vs.
"You rescue a puppy — and you feel rescued, too! GET OUT OF JAIL FREE."

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"Just when you think you can't go another step, you finish that foot race — and raise money for your local hospital! ADVANCE TO GO. COLLECT $200"
vs.
"You shopped local ALL week! ADVANCE TO GO. COLLECT $200"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You organize a block party so people on your street can get to know each other. COLLECT $10 FROM EACH PLAYER."
vs.
"You pass out umbrellas to people standing at a bus stop on a rainy Monday morning. COLLECT $10 FROM EACH PLAYER."

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"Meow! You knit cozy sweaters for the hairless cats at your local animal shelter. COLLECT $20"
vs.
"You help your neighbor bring in her groceries. She makes you lunch to say thanks! COLLECT $20"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You go to the local school's car wash fundraiser — but you forget to close your windows! PAY $100"
vs.
"You held a neighborhood party — but you didn't recycle your trash! PAY $100"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You didn't shop local! PAY $50"
vs.
"You buy a few bags of cookies from that school bake sale. Yum! PAY $50"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You volunteer at your local literacy center and learn some fun phrases in a new language! COLLECT $100"
vs.
"You help build a new school playground — then you get to test the slide! COLLECT $100"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"Your fuzzy friends at the animal shelter will be thankful for your donation. PAY $50"
vs.
"Your cousin forgot their wallet! You happily pay for dinner. PAY $50."

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You organize a family reunion! COLLECT $200"
vs.
"You help your neighbors clean up their yards after a big storm. COLLECT $200"

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

"You graciously host a group of international students. They appreciate the home cooking! FOR EACH HOUSE YOU OWN, PAY $40. FOR EACH HOTEL YOU OWN, PAY $115."
vs.
"You should have volunteered for that home improvement project — you would have learned valuable skills! FOR EACH HOUSE YOU OWN, PAY $40. FOR EACH HOTEL YOU OWN, PAY $115."

Image source: MonopolyCommunityChest.com screen shot

(H/T: New York Post)